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THE JOB OF BEING GOD  
job of being God  


The Sands of time were running round a riot, hissing at the door, wishing for a hand to stir them more towards some movement.
The man named Sam sat on the appropriate seat. ‘I’ve come for the job of being God.’
Molly looked up from her scribbling. ‘Yes I guessed that, seeing as you’re here. If its all the same to you, I’ll take a whiz and be back before you knew it.’
The Dead were waiting at the gate but no one was willing to change the fate and turn the key.
Issy smiled at Sam, hoping to ease his knees from so much knocking. 
Sam pressed his legs hard to the ground. ‘You’re not what I was expecting?’ 
Issy smiled, showed some teeth. ‘We are, we aren’t, we can be. Who would you prefer to see we might arrange it?’
‘I don’t know,’ his hands were drawing a frozen sea, ‘maybe you’re like an iceberg, you know, most of it is underwater, but I guess it could be worse.’
Anarchy was conniving on its birth, it tilted all to its own ends, pretends with a winning smile but rends the fabric its suspended from.
Molly ran back, jumped on the couch. ‘That’s better. Now lets see the form. It says here you have experience in this line of work.’
‘Yes, when I was young I ruled a world of toys and monsters. I guaranteed fair play and gave a safety for the monsters underneath the bed. I made sure any transgression from my rules were met by firm but just punishment. I made the toys live the lives of the cries that the monsters gave and as for the monsters I gave them a mirror.’
Too early turned too late and in the descent of time the gates were losing faith that they could hold.
Issy paced round the space assessing the hairs on Sam’s head. ‘I see, very good, now then if its you and me where would you say its best that you were serving, what would be your top priority?’
Sam was aching for a good scratch of his arse but felt that might lessen his chances. ‘A bit more wrath to get everyone’s attention, to tidy up the mess. Then on the other hand some mercy and a touch of hope; carrot and stick. Sometimes I find you have to be cruel to be kind.’
The voids where speaking to each other, thinking that now brother could join with brother, a grand parade of nadir, naught, and nothingness.
Molly wrote some notes and tried to look more interested. ‘So you like to play games well this is one you would have to win every time. You don’t look that strong, are you sure you have the stamina to play it?’
Sam twisted his head to see what Molly had written; but it was no good her notes were spelt in letters unknown. ‘This is absurd we can’t get anywhere like this, are you debating in yourself whether its worth keeping me at all? Wouldn’t it be better to move on sing a song and heave me out of here. What’s the point of this, I can see the stars, I want a heaven like that but its not possible if you can see but wont let go of the safety rail; that’s no way to travel. Doubt is a rich reward, it scars you and writes its name on you, claims you. Have doubt or me your choice.’
Molly grinned and clapped. ‘Very good, I saw that written on the toilet wall but you said it very well.’
As Molly spoke a spirit was whispering in Issy’s ear. ‘Okay, my turn, if its too much bother then I’m sorry but please say why you have a hankering for this King job of all?’
‘Well I’m a bit of a megalomaniac. They gave me pills but they didn’t take. Plus a streak of altruism and the general belief I’m beyond all criticism. I like things running orderly, my wonderings are a spiral coming back to me. Plus I’m self sustaining I don’t need others praise, I know I’m the best there is and that’s enough.’
Molly put on her best interrogation face, she would have liked the lights but they had been banned. ‘Is there more than we can say for you. Is there a God that you are knowing, how about is it there to be seen? Have you some experience of bigger things?’
The chair was standing straight but Sam was being buffeted from side to side. ‘Well the clouds move at my will and I command the seas to turn but its a secret, I don’t want everyone to know. Like when I get this job I wont go off bragging. So when I’m sitting on the bus I don’t want no bugger to go ‘Hey God that was a shitty time to have a thunderstorm.’ Little bit of anonymity is fine for me I don’t need no praising.’
Issy was looking down the list wishing for some other type of punter. ‘When you’re feeling kind of grey do you believe yourself that you can be okay. No stop round and round. Okay what I was meaning, we’ve been asking you questions but is there anything that you prefer to say to us?’
Sam was thinking that when he ascended the throne the first thing to do would give these two the old heave ho. ‘Wait a minute I’m getting prepared, okay ready now to speak. Card games and gambles have been my life, but then ordinary me sees an opening, I think its best to foreswear all the goodness and write as if God in his wisdom has forgiven me. So then I might find a new place and literally reveal to you all the harm that I’ve done in the past; a charlatan. Now that I’m known I prefer it to be said that I care as much as I can for you and the crew. I prefer to be seen as striving for as good as it gets, thank you.’
Dark matter like ants were doing a nice little dance before they unglued the gravity of the situation.
They took a break for tea. Molly dunked her biscuit. Sam remarked that was awfully infra dig where he came from. Molly sucked the soggy pleasure. ‘Remind me not to go there.’
Next came the tests;
‘You have five minutes, starting now.’
‘As is hopeless give a light to the lost and unforeseen.’
‘Hating is no good for you, never gets things done. Make a peace with all the ones who have wished you ill and damned your life before please.’
‘Suppose it was said you hold a chance to begin your life again. Pick and mix a different path to tread please.’
‘Holding steady while all about you are falling, build a wall which will withstand the winds of time eternally, be there for ever more.’
‘Pick your nose, or rather don’t. Say again your name then stand by it, though all a world throw pieces at it saying you’re a liar.’

Sam finished a height of bricks but when the alarm rang the bricks fell down.
They gathered round the fallen wall thinking of eternal but seeing just a mess.
Sam picked up a brick and laid it on another. ‘You do know I’m really God don’t you?’
Molly stroked his cheek. ‘We all are darling, we all are.’